Grace for Worship

"You have created us for Yourself, O God,
and our hearts are restless
until they find their rest in You."
Augustine

To say that my heart was restless would be a gross understatement.  My heart has been overwhelmed with sadness and over the past few days it has been developing a very serious "hardening" condition.  This morning I read this quote and it touched something deep within.  I recognized the truth in the words and my spirit was stirred.  But I felt lost.  I wanted to run to Him, to be held by Him, to receive His comfort and listen to His tender voice speak truth...but I didn't know where to find Him.  I was completely aware that the only thing my heart was crying out for was Jesus. 
"Whom do I have in heaven but You?  And earth has nothing I desire besides You."
It is shocking with all that this world has to offer, that when everything is stripped away and I am sitting in the dark, I am asking not for circumstances to change, but for the presence of my Savior.  I just wanted Him.  I just needed to hear from Him.
And then what happened? 
Grace was given.
Grace was given to shed the necessary tears.  To crawl up into His lap, which had never moved, and cry out to Him.  Grace was given to listen, to see His heart and to worship.
And in the midst of worship, a desire was expressed.  This Christmas season I want to be a worshipper.  Every day I am going to beg God for the grace to worship.  I am going to beg Jesus for the grace to focus on Him and not the grief and loss.  Let them not distract from the glory of this season and what I have been given by Christ.  Without His grace I am just a forgetful, ungrateful child, consumed with myself, listening to lies and looking at life from a distorted perspective. So, with that in mind, may the miracle of this season be the one in my heart. I know I have the unique opportunity to experience more joy and worship than ever before because of Jesus.  In His love He has removed all of the distractions in my life and given me the grace to worship.  Come and worship.